In May 28 Issue
The case of the Russell County Armadillo. we were told this past weekend of an Armadillo on 127 that had apparently been run over by someone or something.
Now where did an Armadillo came from in Russell County. Who knows? Sue Foley called and stated she saw it, so we know for a fact it was there. If Joe Foley had been the one to call, we would have questioned the story but we can believe Sue. So, if you have a pet Armadillo that is missing, we have bad news for you. If Armadillos are migrating to Russell County, we have news for all of you.
A 1st grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds because the last one is a classic!
1. Don't change horses
until they stop running.
2. Strike while the
bug is close.
3. It's always darkest before
Daylight Saving Time .
4. Never underestimate the power of
5. You can lead a horse to water but
6. Don't bite the hand that
7. No news is
8. A miss is as good as a
9. You can't teach an old dog new
10. If you lie down with dogs, you'll
stink in the morning.
11. Love all, trust
12. The pen is mightier than the
13. An idle mind is
the best way to relax .
14. Where there's smoke there's
15. Happy is the bride who
gets all the presents.
16. A penny saved is
17. Two's company, three's
18. Don't put off till tomorrow what
you put on to go to bed.
19. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and
You have to blow your nose.
20. There are none so blind as
Stevie Wonder .
21. Children should be seen and not
spanked or grounded.
22. If at first you don't succeed
get new batteries.
23. You get out of something only what you
See in the picture on the box
24. When the blind lead the blind
get out of the way.
25. A bird in the hand
is going to poop on you.
And the WINNER and last one!
26 Better late than
We were told that Eric West was overheard chatting casually at work over the water cooler. The conversation turned to golf and one asked Eric, "Do you play?"
"Yes, Eric replied, "But I’m not really very good. I consistently shoot in the lower seventies."
There was a long, low intake of breath, then the other man said, "Lower seventies, huh?"
"Yes," Eric said.
"Yup, Every hole," West said.
The young suitor was determined to win the heart of the girl he wanted to marry, in spite of her rejection of his proposals a number of times.
He began what can only be called "Campaigning" and sent her a small token of his affection every day for a month to her house.
Soon, the young lady fell in love with the UPS man.
A travel agent looked up from his desk and saw an older lady and an older gentleman peering into the shop window, where there were posters of glamorous destinations around the world. The agent had had a good week, and the dejected couple looking in the window gave him a rare feeling of generosity.
He called them into his shop. "I know that on your pension you could never hope to have a holiday, so I am sending you to a fabulous resort at my expense, and I won't take no for an answer." He took them inside and asked his secretary to write two flight tickets and book a room in a five-star hotel.
The older lady and gentleman, as could be expected, gladly accepted and were off! About a month later, the little lady came in to the travel agency. "And how did you like your holiday?" the agent asked eagerly.
"The flight was exciting, and the room was lovely," she said. "I've come to thank you. But, one thing puzzled me. Who was that old guy I had to share the room with?"
A man was chosen for jury duty who very much wanted to be dismissed from serving. He tried every excuse he could think of but none of them worked.
On the day of the trial he decided to give it one more shot. As the trial was about to begin he asked if he could approach the bench.
"Your Honor," he said, "I must be excused from this trial because I am prejudiced against the defendant. I took one look at the man in the blue suit with those beady eyes and that dishonest face and I said, 'He's a crook! He's guilty, guilty, guilty.' So your Honor, I could not possibly stay on this jury!"
With a tired annoyance the judge replied, "Get back in the jury box. That man is his lawyer."