In June 10 Issue
Well, my head is much bigger after Chanson walked across the stage in his cap and gown last week. We know there are many others feeling this great surge of pride as the graduating class was presented.
We remember when Chanson was born, Terril Flanagan came over to the hospital to visit and Terril said other visitors had to dodge us as our head was so big it took up the whole hallway.
While we were certainly proud we are also thinking about the day he moves to Lexington. Or rather, let’s do not think about that. But on the other hand, maybe we will like living there.
We had lost a few pounds but the new catfish restaurant across the street from our real estate office is taking care of that. It’s just so hard not to walk across the street.
William Bexler, the chef and head dude, is putting out some great catfish and chicken. The fish filets are just wonderful and a few days ago, we finally stopped saying fish and took a look at the menu and discovered that our favorite - oysters - were also offered. They are just lightly breaded and simply wonderful. They have oyster dinners, baskets, oyster salads, and just oysters. Then after we finally settled down a little over this great discovery we found out this week he is now offering our other all time favorite, fried green tomatoes. Next thing you know he will be offering our other favorite, alligator.
Oh, you say he is already offering alligator.
These insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words and/or symbols.
"He had delusions of adequacy."
- Walter Kerr
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
- Winston Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
- Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?
- Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
- Moses Hadas
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
- Mark Twain
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.."
- Oscar Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one."
- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
- Stephen Bishop
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
- John Bright
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
- Irvin S. Cobb
"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."
- Samuel Johnson
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
- Paul Keating
"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
- Charles, Count Talleyrand
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
- Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
- Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
- Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
- Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination."
- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."
- Groucho Marx
"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure."
- Jack E. Leonard
"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt."
- Robert Redford
"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge."
- Thomas Brackett Reed
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
- Billy Wilder
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."
- Abraham Lincoln
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
- Winston Churchill
The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor:
She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison."
He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, 'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in 'Slim Fast'. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!'
His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded.
The next morning her husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. 'What the heck is this?' he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out.
'April', he hollered into the bathroom, 'Why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?'
She replied with a snicker. 'It's not talcum powder; it's 'Miracle Grow'!
See you next week. And enjoy the fair.